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Tool 5 · Directory

Vetted referral paths.

Seven places to find the kind of professional that fits where you are. The directories are the official ones the field uses; we put them in one place so you don't have to dig.

Online therapy · Affiliate

Online-Therapy.com (CBT-based)

A structured, CBT-based online platform with a licensed therapist, worksheets, journaling, and message-based support between sessions. Useful when scheduling, geography, or the privacy of an office visit makes in-person care hard. Work it as the individual track alongside a couples therapist, or as the standalone individual track if that's what fits.

When this fits: Often the right first step: it removes the friction of finding a local therapist (which is itself a common reason the work stalls), and the CBT format fits the kind of structured thinking the work below benefits from.
Decision-stage help

Discernment counseling

For couples where one or both partners is unsure whether to work on the marriage. Typically 1–5 sessions; produces a clear three-path decision (work on it, separate, or end it). Not couples therapy. The right place to start when commitment is mixed.

When this fits: Start here if you and your partner aren't aligned on whether the marriage is being repaired, or if previous couples therapy didn't move things.
Couples therapy — emotional

EFT (Emotionally Focused Therapy) — ICEEFT

Sue Johnson's attachment-based model. Strongest evidence base for couples whose dominant complaint is disconnection, withdrawal, or emotional distance. The directory at ICEEFT lists certified clinicians.

When this fits: Right if the marriage feels lonely, numb, or distant, but both partners are committed to working on it.
Couples therapy — behavioral

Gottman Method — Gottman Referral Network

The most extensively researched behavioral approach to couples work. Best fit when the marriage is committed but the day-to-day patterns (communication, conflict, parenting differences) are eroding the connection. Look for Levels 1–3 certification.

When this fits: Right if the marriage is committed but the daily mechanics keep going sideways.
Individual therapy

Psychology Today therapist directory

When one or both partners is carrying significant individual distress (depression, trauma, addiction, anxiety), individual therapy comes first. Psychology Today's directory lets you filter by insurance, modality, and identity.

When this fits: Right when the marriage problem is downstream of an individual problem that needs its own attention.
Financial planning

Certified Divorce Financial Analysts (CDFA)

A CDFA models the financial impact of divorce scenarios before you commit to any path: asset division, support, taxes, retirement, college costs. Not a substitute for a family-law attorney, but the right complement when assets are non-trivial. FINRA's public records site verifies credentials.

When this fits: Bring one in early if the financial picture is more complex than two paychecks and a checking account.
Crisis & safety

If you are not safe

This book and these tools are not appropriate for relationships that involve abuse, coercive control, or physical danger. The line between "hard marriage" and "unsafe situation" is sometimes unclear from the inside. The hotline is confidential and can help you sort it.

When this fits: Call or text immediately if you are unsure about your safety.
Affiliate disclosure. The Online-Therapy.com link is an affiliate link. If you start a subscription through it, Reward Reset Publishing earns a commission at no additional cost to you. Online-Therapy is included on its merits as a structured CBT-based option, not because of the affiliate relationship; the other directories on this page have no commercial arrangement with us.

Not legal or medical advice. Reward Reset Publishing is not affiliated with ICEEFT, the Gottman Institute, FINRA, the Institute for Divorce Financial Analysts, or any individual practitioner listed via these directories. Verify credentials and fit independently before engaging any professional. Insurance, jurisdiction, and clinical training all matter and vary by directory entry.